The Yellow Boat

Well, after threatening, dreaming, and schemeing for almost two years, I finally did it--I bought a LiquidLogic Remix XP9. I guess I shouldn't call it a "boat" (lowly word that it is), but it IS a boat, technically speaking. More specifically, a kayak, defined loosely by me as, "1. any floatable watercraft containing a seat, leg traps, a semi-dry hatch, and more charisma than is probably legal; 2. a watercraft easily capsized deliberately or not (called a "roll") designed to put the appreciation for life back into its pilot as he/she hits 36-degree water"; 3. My plans for summer.

I'm a newbie kayaker, having only been in a sit-on-top about 25 years ago in OK (yes, they do have kayaks there), and I also remember how much fun the guy in the kayak had who filmed my capsized raft adventure in 1997 on the Arkansas River (Sidell Suckhole, I still respect you). We have that guy to thank, my friends and I, for the slow-mo video of our chaotic raft exit, guide and all. Later, in the Lariat Bar, our mishap paled in comparison to the monster falls and whitewater threshing machines other kayakers were braving up on the big screen. Right about my third beer, I knew I wanted a kayak even though I'd never have the guts to do those 5 and 5 ++ rapids.

So, here I am, my XP9 sitting in the middle of the den with enough equipment in it to open my own kayak retail clothing and gear shop. Am I exicted? You bet! Scared? A little, but probably nothing compared to those first few minutes I'll spend in some pond the middle of June, then on the AR River the next day. Hope deferred makes the heart sick. Fear deferred makes the heart glad!

I'm looking for enough insurance coverage to cremate me, should the need arise. And I'm hoping, of course, that I won't need it. But it is a serious consideration, what with one eye and all, and that one eye not the best-working model. But hey--no one can see in the middle of the rapid; it's whitewater all-around, and ya just keep strokin'. I've thought seriously of putting that Rush song title "Workin' Them Angels Overtime" on the side of my yellow boat.

Yellow boat. Uh-oh.

According to author Linda Greenlaw, to commercial fishermen, yellow is BAD LUCK for a boat. So is bringing bananas aboard. Or having a turned-over hatch cover (which implies a boat's capsize). It's also bad luck, according to Greenlaw, to have a woman onboard a boat, or for a woman to pilot a boat.

Considering she was one of the best commercial fishermen (she doesn't mind the "men" part of that word, though she's not gay) on the entire East coast, I think she's got the right perspective.

So, I'm going with Greenlaw. Wish me luck!